What if you just don't know?
I recently undertook a private business mastermind masterclass series to dive into what was the deepest desire in my business and my life within it.
Some truths surfaced that were very apparently leading me in the wrong direction.
Four years ago after my mum passed away I decided to leave my husband as I wasn’t living and breathing my truth. What I mean by that is I truly had no idea who I was any more.
The last memory was sometime in my early twenties, when I was out of University as a wild art student wanting to change the world for the better.
Then life happened or rather I let life happen to me.
People said around me ‘oh that’s a normal part of getting older’ ‘you can’t stay young forever’ But I didn’t just equate my freedom and happiness with youth, it felt like my birthright.
What is the point of living otherwise?
So when I took that giant leap of faith at 40, I was terrified, what was I doing? What if I fucked everything up?
But the burning questions that fuelled me were, what if I make it? I actually live a life of my dreams? What If I can create what I believe I am?
That was the fire in me, that kept me alight in the first few months. I believe there was a better version of me being re-birthed through this chaos.
Now that was four years ago, and during this mastermind I felt a little sad that I had lost vision of that passion.
Why was I feeling flat? I couldn’t understand it, as I was putting everything I’d wanted into practise. But that was just the point, it wasn’t what I wanted.
My ideas of a business were being shaped upon the generalised views of what a business is. How I need to show up, serve and express myself, I realise was not coming from me at all, but from what I believed was expected of me as a business owner.
That’s not what I was trying to create at all! I did not leave one prison to join another!
I realised that my unique expression of a collection of projects that I might call ‘work’ (although I don’t like that word) was a highly nuanced, organic being in itself. It didn’t fit into one ‘brand’ but many different personalities.
This I believe is the future.
It’s sustainable because it’s part of who you are. It comes from a place of ease, by that I mean your desire to see it birthed into reality outweighs what you perceive as a toil to make it tangible.
I see my business as a means of crafting an expression of my soul in the world. A collection of conduits in which to provide a service.
Now that I am starting to be that incarnation of my business I am beginning to flourish. It requires these elements:
I love what I do and the process of doing it
I have the right skills and experience that is relevant to what I offer
I am being of service, one that is needed
I am able to connect with people who need what I have to offer and clearly share my story so that they understand how I can help.
I understand that my business is like a lover, who has it’s own personality and driving forces, and is somewhat separate from ‘the work’
Your success will arise from much the same process, understanding both inner and outer components.
It’s a container that requires support, nourishment and encouragement.
I have created a container to help you birth a new reality based on your truth, by first releasing the past.
It’s called 30 days to release and starts in October.
You will find this invaluable if you are overwhelmed and need to clear space mentally, physically and practically in order to begin anew.
It is a safe space to declutter, debunk and refresh yourself.
From there will foster a deep connection to self that only knows the best for you.
Applications by DM or join my mailing list at www.create-space.co.uk